How to Deal with Your Enemies
Do you have any enemies? Let me ask that question another way. Are there people who hate you, or curse you, or spitefully use you? If so, Jesus has a word for you. He says we are to love our enemies (Mt. 5:44; Lk. 6:27-28). How is it possible to love our enemies?
The place to begin in answering that question is with the meaning of the word “love.” There are four different Greek words for love. Storge describes family affection. Eros is the passion between a man and a woman (always involving sex). Phila is the warm and tender affection between closest friends. Agape is “unconquerable, invincible goodwill” (Barclay). The people who exercise agape love do not allow insult or injury, resentment or bitterness to prevent them from seeking the other persons highest good.
Agape is the word that is used in the command to love your enemies. In other words, Jesus is not saying we must like our enemies or have tender affection toward them, only that we choose to do what is best for them. That may mean that we see to it that the person is punished, but that decision must not be based on our desire for revenge. It will be to make that person a better person. The punishment will be remedial, not retributive.
When Jesus gave the general command to love our enemies, He added several specific ways to do that. He said, “Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you” (Lk. 6:27-28).
The way to love enemies who hate you is to do good to them. “If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink” (Prov. 25:21).
The way to love enemies who curse you is to bless them. The Greek word translated “bless” means “to speak well of, praise.” When General Robert E. Lee spoke in complimentary terms about someone, a fellow officer said, “General, do you know that the man you spoke so highly of is one of your worst enemies and that he misses no opportunity to slander you?” “Yes,” General Lee said, “but I was asked for my opinion of him, not his opinion of me.”
The way to love enemies who spitefully use you and persecute you (Mt. 5:44) is to pray for them. The Greek word rendered, “spitefully use” means “threaten, revile, abuse.” It always refers to speech (Alexander). Hence, spitefully use and persecute are hostile speech and hostile action.
To sum up, the way to deal with your enemies is to seek their highest good, which means praying for them, speaking well about them and only doing what is good for them. WOW! That is a high standard. That is a tall order! Correct. That is why you will need the grace of God to pull it off (Heb. 4:16). If you do, you will be “perfect (mature), just as your Father in heaven is perfect” (Mt. 5:48).
© G. Michael Cocoris, 10/31/2006
The place to begin in answering that question is with the meaning of the word “love.” There are four different Greek words for love. Storge describes family affection. Eros is the passion between a man and a woman (always involving sex). Phila is the warm and tender affection between closest friends. Agape is “unconquerable, invincible goodwill” (Barclay). The people who exercise agape love do not allow insult or injury, resentment or bitterness to prevent them from seeking the other persons highest good.
Agape is the word that is used in the command to love your enemies. In other words, Jesus is not saying we must like our enemies or have tender affection toward them, only that we choose to do what is best for them. That may mean that we see to it that the person is punished, but that decision must not be based on our desire for revenge. It will be to make that person a better person. The punishment will be remedial, not retributive.
When Jesus gave the general command to love our enemies, He added several specific ways to do that. He said, “Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you” (Lk. 6:27-28).
The way to love enemies who hate you is to do good to them. “If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink” (Prov. 25:21).
The way to love enemies who curse you is to bless them. The Greek word translated “bless” means “to speak well of, praise.” When General Robert E. Lee spoke in complimentary terms about someone, a fellow officer said, “General, do you know that the man you spoke so highly of is one of your worst enemies and that he misses no opportunity to slander you?” “Yes,” General Lee said, “but I was asked for my opinion of him, not his opinion of me.”
The way to love enemies who spitefully use you and persecute you (Mt. 5:44) is to pray for them. The Greek word rendered, “spitefully use” means “threaten, revile, abuse.” It always refers to speech (Alexander). Hence, spitefully use and persecute are hostile speech and hostile action.
To sum up, the way to deal with your enemies is to seek their highest good, which means praying for them, speaking well about them and only doing what is good for them. WOW! That is a high standard. That is a tall order! Correct. That is why you will need the grace of God to pull it off (Heb. 4:16). If you do, you will be “perfect (mature), just as your Father in heaven is perfect” (Mt. 5:48).
© G. Michael Cocoris, 10/31/2006