Insights from the Word
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    • 2000 Articles 1-7 >
      • 1. The Perfect Storm
      • 2. Biographical Update
      • 3. Why so much Judgment?
      • 4. Glasses come in Pairs
      • 5. Why so much about Church?
      • 6. Reflections on an Election
      • 7. For Me to Live is Maintenance
    • 2001 Articles 8-22 >
      • 8. From Common Sense to nonsense
      • 9. Left Behind
      • 10. Owners or Guardians?
      • 11. From Honeymoon Harmony to Divorce
      • 12. For Goodness Sake
      • 13. A Perfect Prayer
      • 14. No is not a Negative
      • 15. What My Shoes have Taught Me
      • 16. For Mercy Sake
      • 17. The Attack on America
      • 18. The Motivation of a Sucide Terrorest
      • 19. The Message of the Terorist
      • 20. The Anthrax Scare
      • 21. Real Thanksgiving
      • 22. I have been Robbed!
    • 2002 Articles 23-39 >
      • 23. A Tribute to George
      • 24. Church Math
      • 25. Marriage Math
      • 26. How Sad
      • 27. The Anatomy of an Affair
      • 28. "I have a Problem."
      • 29. When
      • 30. Sport History
      • 31. Under God
      • 32. An "Honest" Thief
      • 33. Why does Life have to be so Difficult?
      • 34. A Tribute to Maria
      • 35. What Jesus' Words Have Taught Me
      • 36. Who Ministers to the Minister?
      • 37. The Whiner
      • 38. Reckoned Righteous by Works
      • 39. Are New Year's Resolutions Biblical?
    • 2003 Articles 40-53 >
      • 40. One of the Greatest Need America
      • 41. Your Memorial Table
      • 42. George W. Bush Verses Saddam Hussein
      • 43. Learning to Listen
      • 44. The Problem with Gambling
      • 45. Memorial Day
      • 46. My Ecounter with an Orthhodox Jew
      • 47. Scott Free
      • 48. What My Auto Accident Taught Me
      • 49. The Decline in Family Living
      • 50. Give Me a Problem
      • 51. Decoding the Da Vinci Code
      • 52. Thanksgiving is not a Holiday
      • 53. What a Christmas Present!
    • 2004 Articles 54-67 >
      • 54. What Do You Mean by that?
      • 55. What are Parents to Do?
      • 56. "The Passion of Christ"
      • 57. Martha Stewart's Greatest Lesson
      • 58. Same Sex Marriage
      • 59. A Tribute to a Servant
      • 60. Happy Marriages
      • 61. Independence
      • 62. Kerry's Logic
      • 63. The Olympic Spirit
      • 64. Playing Cards
      • 65. Cardinal Virtures
      • 66. Now that the Election is over
      • 67. Tribute to My Mother
    • 2005 Articles 68-79 >
      • 68. Real Spiritual Growth
      • 69. No Time to Think
      • 70. The Ten Commandments Controversy
      • 71. Do We Need a Pope?
      • 72. Everybody Loves Raymond
      • 73. Examples Worthy of Note
      • 74. How Two Different People Learned to Get Along
      • 75. "The God who Wasn't"
      • 76. Katrina and Now Rita!
      • 77. Would You Say "No" to $4 Million?
      • 78. "In God We Trust"
      • 79. The Redemption of Tookie Willaims
    • 2006 Articles 80-91 >
      • 80. Is Religion a Problem?
      • 81. The Rights of the Born
      • 82. Did You Hear What She Said about Muslims?
      • 83. Judas: Betrayer or Best Friend?
      • 84. Weekend or Week--Beginning?
      • 85. A Tribute to My (Spiritual) Father
      • 86. Your Relationship to the Word of God
      • 87. What an Opportunity!
      • 88. America's Four Gods
      • 89. How to Deal with Your Enemies
      • 90. The Case for Systematic Exposition
      • 91. Don't Miss the Message
    • 2007 Articles 92-104 >
      • 92. I can Afford it!
      • 93. The Gospel according to Patricia
      • 94. The Functional Church
      • 95. Who wants to Deal with a Taxman?
      • 96. Vital Virtures
      • 97. Have You Grown up Yet?
      • 98. A July 4th Reminder
      • 99. The Volume of Silence
      • 100. Biblical Illiteracy
      • 101. A Modest Political Propospal
      • 102. How to Handle Credit Cards
      • 103. When it is Tough to be Thankful
      • 104. Romney's Religion
    • 2008 Articles 105-114 >
      • 105. Continue
      • 106. A Tribute to Jack
      • 107. Why Good Ftiday?
      • 108. Happy Birthday
      • 109. The Most Important Room in the House
      • 110. The 80-20 Rule
      • 111. Be Sensible
      • 112. To Be Like Christ
      • 113. Sweet Reasonableness
      • 114. The Other Benefit of Christmas
    • 2009 Articles 115-126 >
      • 115. What Determines who Obtains Eternal Life?
      • 116. The Healing Touch
      • 117. The Function of Dysfunction
      • 118. When Your World Falls Apart
      • 119. 24-7-365
      • 120. To Complain or not to Complain
      • 121. "Suggestions"
      • 122. Making a Mark
      • 123. God's Timing
      • 124. Jesus Wept
      • 125. Andrew
      • 126. The Cost of Service
    • 2010 Articles 127-138 >
      • 127. Don't Ask; Don't Tell
      • 128. A Forest Dark
      • 129. The Rule of Law
      • 130. The Hits and Miss of Grace
      • 131. People Need the Lord
      • 132. Examples Worthy of Notes
      • 133. A Hassle Reduction Strategy
      • 134. Gossip
      • 135. My Favorite Poem
      • 136. Let's Put the Cross in its Place
      • 137. "Don't Spare Me"
      • 138 The Unseen Message of Christmas
    • 2011 Articles 139-147 >
      • 139. What Parents Should Teach their Children
      • 140. How to Avoid Having to Serve
      • 141. What Happen to Mike?
      • 142. An Atheist Recommends God
      • 143. Surprise
      • 144. Socialism
      • 145. Union, Unity, and Uniformity
      • 146. Get in the Way
      • 147. "Let George do it."
    • 2012 Articles 148-160 >
      • 148. Truth or Consequences
      • 149. Don't Leave Home without it
      • 150. Take a Break
      • 151. The Worth of an Individual
      • 152. A Tribute to Nana
      • 153. Jesus Crossed the Line
      • 154. Thomas Jefferson
      • 155. Taxes
      • 156. You Must be Present to Win
      • 157. A Grandfather's Wish
      • 158. Trials. Temptations, and Tests
      • 159. Is There a Santa Claus?
      • 160. A Tribute to Sumner Wemp
    • 2013 Articles 161-172 >
      • 161. How to Finish Well
      • 162. Rewards
      • 163. Spiritual Binging
      • 164. There is no way out of this one
      • 165. Half Empty or Half Full
      • 166. Nones
      • 167. Greet One Another with a Holy Kiss
      • 168. God's Answer to Atheism
      • 169. Obedience
      • 170. The Problem of Fellowship with God
      • 171. Character Development
      • 172. For Mercy's Sake
    • 2014 Articles 173-180 >
      • 173. Lies
      • 174. Endure to the End
      • 175. Teaching Children How Money Grows
      • 176. The Principle of Delay
      • 177. By Their Fruit
      • 178. Sermons that Changed My Life
      • 179. If Paul Harvey were the Devil
      • 180. The Principle of Practice
    • 2015 Articles 181- >
      • 181. In Wrath Remember Mercy
      • 182. Choosing the Right Shepherd
      • 183. The Lord's Requirements
      • 184. Your Ear Lobe. Thumb, and Big Toe
      • More articles will be added as they are written
  • Basic Courses
    • The Spiritual Life
    • The Family Life (The Ultimate in Marriage)
    • The Christian Life
    • Bible Overview (The Plane View of the Bible)
    • Bible Survey (The Bible: Book by Book)
    • Bible Doctrine (Relating Doctrine to Daily Life)
    • Bible Evangelism (Evangelism without Fear)
    • Bible Study (Oh to Know the Truth)
    • Bible Teaching (How to Prepare Effective Messaages)
    • Church History
  • Advanced Courses
    • The Formation of the Bible (the canon)
    • The Translation of the Bible
    • The Chronology of the Bible
    • The Historical Accuracy of the Bible
    • Jewish Prophecies of the Messiah
    • The Synoptic Problem
    • The Riddle of Revelation
  • Topical Studies
    • Struggling with Assurance
    • Eternal Security
    • Prayer
    • The Will of God
    • The 5 Principles
    • Are Believers under the Mosaic Law?
    • Why So Many Denominations?
    • Natural Disasters
    • The Explanation of Mass Murder
    • Do we need a Pope?
    • More Topical Studies coming
  • Theological Studies
    • Is Baptism Necessary for Salvation?
    • Roman Catholicism
    • Calvinism
    • Lordship Salvation: Is it Biblical?
    • John MacArthur Jr.'s System of Salvation
    • The Miraculous Today
    • Should you seek the Baptism of the Holy Spirit?
    • Speaking in Tongues
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    • About Mike
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Happy Marriages

What is the secret to a happy marriage? An old adage says, “Opposites attract.” Most social scientists say that as general rule, opposites might initially attracted, but over time they tend to repel. What is important is shared goals, values, and what they want out of the relationship.

After being happily married for 45 years and having counseled thousands of couples for 35 years, psychologist Neil Clark Warren, founder of the eharmony.com, an internet matchmaking service, concluded that the happiest couples were those who tend to be of similar intelligence, energy, ambition and industriousness, with many common interests and things they enjoy doing together. Some things such as a religion or wanting or not wanting to have children are critical depending on how important those factors are to each individual. One particularly significant measure of compatibility seems to be whether are not to people share a passion for the arts. If neither does, it’s fine, but if one does and the other doesn’t, it could be a big problem (Los Angeles Times, 4/26/04, p. F8).

There are other factors. Claiming he knows “all the pitfalls” of marriage, Patrick A. Winning, a divorce attorney, says the primary factors he sees in his clients who are seeking a divorce are the inability to communicate and the inability to manage conflict. Granted, one might expect that from couples seeking a divorce, but at the same time, common sense would say that the couples who does not communicate or manage conflict are headed for trouble, if not a divorce.

Then, there in is chemistry. To my knowledge, no one has yet figured out why one is drawn to one person and not another, but that is a reality of life. Warren says he does not understand attraction, adding “I don’t care how compatible you are, if there’s no chemistry, don’t seal the thing: Love minus chemistry equals friendship. Don’t try to turn it into love.”

This much I know. The happiest couples I know, including my wife, Patricia and I, have chemistry. Such couples just seemed to be very much in love with each other. They enjoy each other’s company. They like to do things together, even simple things. They touch each other. They finish each others sentences. They brag about being “soul-mates.”

If you are not yet married, compatibility, communication, and chemistry ought to be major criteria in your search for a soul-mate. Needless to say, if you are a believer in Jesus Christ, He ought to be at the top of the list. If you know the Lord and a potential partner doesn’t, there is a huge problem with compatibility.

If you’re already married, major on the things the two of you have in common. Improve your compatibility. Communicate. Work on developing the relationship. In the final analysis, a happy marriage takes hard work.

                                   © G. Michael Cocoris, 6/29/2004
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